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I have a preoccupation with words and sounds that some might say
borders on the obsessive. This is nothing new to me. When I was
five years old, my only way of coping with the world was to hide
myself in a room and listen to mid-60s pop singles. I was obsessive
to the point of being able to memorize every bit of label copy.
I kept the AM radio tucked under the pillow at night, listening
to stations from exotic and faraway places. New York City, Boston,
Philadelphia: the cities faded in and out uncontrollably, depending
on the weather.
I started writing music when I was nine, feeling like this was
my only calling in life. 26 years later, I finally feel content
with myself. I understand my obsession and recognize that it has
left me here, with this current recording.
Making this record was something I've always wanted to do, by
myself, for myself. I wrote every word, played every note, created
the artwork. There is no distilling of the thoughts, no explanations
to other musicians about the raw emotion; this is the sound inside
my head. It's strange to share the result with others, mostly
because I wasn't completely sure what I was doing, in an emotional
and creative sense.
Since 1985, I've always created what people would common call
"demos." Usually they've sounded as good, if not better, than
the actual recorded-for-release versions. It's often said that
the first recorded version of a song is the best because it captures
the essence of the idea. It's more of an unconscious work. This
albumis the closest I've come to creating that style of document;
the emphasis is more on composition and arrangement, and less
on the dynamic interplay between writer and interpreters. I was
aware of the trade-off when starting this project, and I hope
the personal nature of the work more than makes up for any lack
of group interplay.
I recognize that most people might not understand the conflicts
and contradictions of the music business that have made thesmelves
apparent to me over the last few years. Measures of success, lack
of privacy, concern for the craft: I've hinted at how these issues
have affected me in the past. I've always tried to be as honest
as possible while attempting to maintain what little privacy I
deserve. As a result, I've been accused of "making good copy"
and that concerns me. I value my work too much and have too much
pride in myself to remain unaffected by the cynics. I've found
that some things I've said may not have been fully understood
or appreciated in the public forum. This time around, I don't
have much to add beyond this press release -- explanations don't
seem appropriate, and they may not be necessary.
I appreciate the respect I've earned from people much more than
the kind of success that's measured by sales and financial reward.
SUGAR ended for various reasons, but in hindsight, I think the
initial satisfaction of three like-minded people having fun with
music may have turned into that quest for success. SUGAR began
very organically, without a plan. We were three people who enjoyed
each others' company and enjoyed playing music together. Somewhere
along the way something changed. Obsessions interceded: sales,
credibility, money, the competitive nature of the music business.
Once the business gives you a taste of the spotlight, it's hard
to let go of it. It's the elixir of fame, knowing that you have
a gift for shaping peoples' perceptions of themselves and the
world around them. It's a gift that should not be taken lightly.
When external forces begin to elevate you too much, you can lose
sight of the gift. Or, even worse, begin to use it as a weapon.
So, for me, this record ended up being something less complicated,
and more personal and revealing. Compared to my previous work,
this one is unique. It represents a natural step toward a new
direction, and while I have no idea how long I'll stay with this
approach, it's fun for now.
I have no desire to talk about myself every day for the next three
months, nor do I feel any great need to perform these songs 100
times in the four months after the talking stops. I would prefer
to continue writing and working toward the next record. Maybe
then I'll feel the urge to run the gauntlet again, but not this
year.
The thoughts and emotions of this record speak for themselves
-- there's not much else I can add. Enjoy.
BOB MOULD |
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